I cannot tell you how devastating it is for young people to not have an authentic dad in their life.  I’m not talking about someone who “fathered” a child, I am talking about a man who is closely involved in the lives of his children.  I am talking about a man who will sacrifice his own life for the benefit of his kids; who will love them through thick and thin, who will provide for them, protect them, love them enough to properly discipline them, and someone who will be there for them . . . always.

Maybe you’re not a dad.  (If you’re one of the wonderful gals out there, pray for us guys and then make sure several men that you know have a chance to read this blog.) Maybe you’re a grandfather, uncle, brother or friend.  Families may look a bit different from each other now days, but all kids need a “father.”

Here’s a sad thing:

”more and more kids are growing up with dads who are “absent”
. . . either physically or emotionally”

In other words, fathers are just not there for their kids.  Absent fathers are not teaching, guiding, supporting, playing with, encouraging, making a way for success, challenging, instilling values, or teaching the Word to their children.  There’s an epidemic of kids growing up in isolation without Godly male leadership in their lives.
Men: It’s up to us!

Maybe you didn’t have such a great example in your life.  Maybe you were wounded by a father figure.  It’s not too late guys.  You can learn to be a terrific father.  You can be the difference between life and death for your kids . . . really.  It has been shown over and over that kids who have dads who are actively engaged in their lives will be less likely to abuse drugs, alcohol, participate in pre-marital sex, or participate in other risky behaviors.

Let me give you some ideas:

1.  Make sure your own life is in order:
• ask God for the wisdom to be a godly, servant-hearted leader.
• you might have to “suck it up” and ask some Christian brothers to help you out.

2.  Love their mom:
• your love and support for your wife will be the best thing that will cause your kids to grow up safe, secure, and learn about healthy, wholesome relationships.
• and it will provide a loving, safe, healthy, home-life.

3.  Be a leader:
• you be the one to study God’s Word and then make sure the Bible is read and the Lord is worshipped in your home.
• you be the one to see that everyone gets to church meetings.
• you speak words of life – never bitter or sarcastic.
• you ask for forgiveness – admit it and say you’re sorry.
• you be kind and generous.
• you be servant-hearted – using your gifts to serve others.
• you be the good neighbor – demonstrating respect for others.
• you show your kids what’s right – don’t just say it – do it.

4.  Be active in your kid’s lives:
• read them a story and pray with them when you put them to bed.
• meet their teacher and see how you can help with their education – while placing more importance on their character than their grades.
• provide them with opportunities to encounter God like making sure they get to every youth meeting, camp, missions trip that you can afford and arrange.
• tell them you love them . . . every day.
• listen to them . . . every day: listen to what they did, what’s bothering them, what they’re anticipating and hoping for.
• be there when they need you – not constantly so busy or consumed with “doing your own thing” that you’re never around.

5.  Protect your kids:
• it’s a real trick to watch over your children and keep them from feeling like you’re “hovering” or not letting them grow up – but you can.
• monitor their TV, computer, texting and social-interaction.
• teach them to guard their “eye-gates” and “ear-gates” – watching out what they see and hear.
• go to their school (if necessary) and make sure the powers that be know about unhealthy situations, bullies, or simply bad teachers.
• watch out who their friends are – remind your kids that you’ll do “whatever it takes” to keep them safe – even if you have to “move to Nebraska” to get away from unhealthy opposite sex relationships or trouble from evil people.
• as much as possible, make sure that wise and responsible leaders (like our youth group leadership) are around your teens – you never know when the important questions of life will come and you don’t want some ” snot-nosed, pimply-faced kid” teaching your daughter about sex or “the meaning of life.”

6.  How about this one?
• Go to the Men’s Advance next month!  FOR INFO CLICK HERE

“Armed & Dangerous III” will be a tremendous benefit to you in your ongoing journey to become the best dad, grandfather, brother, or manly leader that God has called you to be.

You can do it!  I know you can . . .

Love you all,
Steve

(taken from Oct 2011)